my private life

Chapter 18

My mother is far more anxious about my marriage than expected.

When I returned home during the Spring Festival, I found out that Xu Lina was married last year, and most of the girls in the dormitory building who were my age were talking about marriage, but I was the only one who didn’t know what to do—this was my mother’s definition of me.

For Liu Qingyan's arrival, my parents didn't show any surprise at first.Because I told my mother in advance that my boss’s sister is from the south and has never seen Saibei’s winter. She wanted to take advantage of the Spring Festival holiday to visit for a few days.

My mother knew that Liu Qingyan was both my boss and my co-tenant, so she was naturally very enthusiastic.In addition to buying clothes for my parents in my name, Liu Qingyan also specially gave my father a Philips electric shaver, and gave my mother a set of Olay cosmetics.

Seeing how happy my mother was playing with those boxes of moisturizer and facial cleanser, I was a little relieved. At least for the seven days at home, their "mother-in-law and daughter-in-law" should be able to coexist peacefully.

Because of the Chinese New Year, the bun shop has been closed.After dinner in the evening, I planned to go to bed early, but my mother stopped me and Liu Qingyan and started asking questions.

"Xiao Liu, how old are you today? Do you have a date?" My mother sat between me and Liu Qingyan, constantly inquiring about Liu Qingyan's situation. Is it. Your mother is not in a hurry? You see, if Fanfan doesn't fall in love, I will really get angry."

I glared at my mother and signaled her not to ask the bottom line, worrying that Liu Qingyan would be unhappy after hearing these words.

"Auntie, I'm not picky, there's really no one suitable." Liu Qingyan put her usual standard smile on her face and responded politely to my mother.

"Hey, I'm worried about Fanfan's marriage. You are the leader and her good sister. You also know a lot of people in Beijing. Help her introduce someone." with.

"Don't worry, Auntie, I will definitely help her find someone." Liu Qingyan looked at my mother with a smile, and I heard a hint of teasing in her voice.

"It's getting late, it's time to rest." I was worried that if I continued to ask, my mother was still not sure what to say, so she hurriedly said, "Sister Liu, go take a bath first." At home, I dare not call her Yanyan anymore. Being too affectionate made my mother find something wrong.

Liu Qingyan immediately got up to take a shower.I entered the hut and prepared to make the bed, while my mother followed me and was still talking about my search for a partner.

"Fanfan, do you still remember Aunt Zhang in Building No. [-]? She has a son who is two years older than you and works in a bank. I think he's a good guy." My mother even started introducing me to someone.

I thought I should dispel her idea and said, "It's hard for me to gain a foothold in Beijing now. I was just promoted to be a director. I don't want to come back."

"He has a very high salary from the bank. With the money you earn in Beijing, you don't have much money left, except for food and lodging. You might as well go home early. I've discussed it with your father. When you come home this year, we'll change houses. Mom has also earned some money in the past few years. I guarantee that your dowry will not be short, and your father and I will be at ease if you marry you off in a good manner." The more my mother talked, the more upset I became.

"Do you dislike me? You want me to marry in such a hurry. I don't want to find a partner now. It's fine to be alone." I don't know how many times I have said this, even I feel that It's just perfunctory.

My mother also heard it naturally, "You are 25, and you will be 27 after the next year. I am your age, and you are two years old. No matter how anxious you are, you will not find a suitable one."

"As soon as I go home, you'll annoy me with this matter. If it's over, I shouldn't come back." I was worried that Liu Qingyan would feel uncomfortable when my mother introduced someone to me, so I said two harsh words, Count on her to shut the subject down.

My mother also became angry and questioned me loudly, "As soon as I tell you about this, you don't want to hear it, so what do you want to do? You can't stay married forever."

"Why not." As soon as the words came out of my mouth, I saw my mother's eyes widen, and I hurriedly slowed down and coaxed her, "Let's talk about this later. I'm in Beijing now, and it's time for you to introduce someone to me." Not in the same city, it’s not realistic.” I wanted to coax her with words first, after the Spring Festival, I went back to Beijing and it’s been another year, and she can’t help it even if she nags.

But my mother seemed to have made up her mind, and she would not stop if I disagreed with the introduction.She simply sat down on the edge of the bed and started a long conversation, "Fanfan, I told your Aunt Zhang that as long as you read it correctly, you will come back and never go to Beijing. At the beginning, I didn't approve of you staying in Beijing. A girl's house..."

When I heard this, I became even more anxious, "How could you make a blind promise without my consent. I will stay in Beijing for the rest of my life, so don't expect me to return to this small city. There is no future for development here. "Unhappy and anxious, I couldn't help raising my voice when I spoke.

My mother rolled her eyes when I robbed her, "If you have the ability, you can find a son-in-law in Beijing, and I'd be happy too. I don't understand, you are such a big girl, why don't you find someone?"

"I have something wrong, it's okay." I said angrily and walked out.Why Liu Qingyan hasn't finished taking a shower for a long time, is she angry?

As soon as I walked out of the room, I saw Liu Qingyan sitting on the sofa in the living room watching TV, apparently she heard the conversation between our mother and daughter.

I was thinking of saying a few words to comfort her when my mother also entered the living room.I had to go take a shower first.

Liu Qingyan lying on the bed didn't look very happy.Both of her and I have been hurt because of the marriage of our first love. I think I should show my attitude and dispel her worries.

Each of us was covered with a quilt.At home, I dare not openly lock the bedroom door like she did.I put my hand under her quilt and stroked her arm. "Yanyan, I swear to you, I will not get married."

"This is your own choice. If you choose to get married, it means that our fate is over, and I will leave naturally." She looked at the ceiling and smiled unnaturally, "We all have the right to choose, so there is no need to say anything Promise, I am responsible for my own actions. I am tired, go to sleep." She turned her back on me.

I know she is unhappy.I wouldn't be happy when it was my turn, but her attitude made me even more depressed.From what I know of her, Liu Qingyan, who has always been sensible, would never make such promises that she regards as empty promises.

But I still hope she will say, "Fanfan, don't find a man, I will be with you for the rest of my life." Such words comfort me.I didn't expect her to be so indifferent.

"I will be responsible for myself and you." I turned off the light and said to her in the dark, "We are so happy now, how could I give up these so easily."

But Liu Qingyan didn't buy it, and said coldly, "I don't need you to take responsibility for me. I said that no matter who it is, walk the path you choose, and you will bear the consequences. No one can bear it for you."

I wanted to say something else, but when I heard her rational and somewhat cruel words, I sighed and stopped talking.

On the morning of the first day of the new year, Aunt Zhang brought her son Gao Shuai to the house.It is said to be a New Year greeting, but it is actually a blind date.

When my mother saw Gao Shuai, who seemed to match his name, she smiled so hard that her eyes closed, serving tea and busy peeling fruit, "Fanfan, come here quickly, and meet your Aunt Zhang. My family, Fanfan, has been in Beijing for the past two years and has become quiet."

I smiled politely as a greeting.Pretending that the kitchen was still boiling water, he hurriedly got up and left the living room.

My mother didn't say in advance that Marshal Gao would come today, I originally planned to have breakfast and take Liu Qingyan out for a walk.What will Liu Qingyan think when she sees me on a blind date.If it were changed, I would definitely not feel better.

I entered my hut, Liu Qingyan got dressed, "I'm going out for a walk by myself, I won't be back for lunch at noon." She actually looked at me and smiled.

I didn't know what to say, leaving her behind and letting her watch and listen to my mother talking and joking with Aunt Gao made her feel even more uncomfortable, but I couldn't bear to let her hang out alone.It was impossible for me to leave the houseguest and go out with her.

"Don't go too far, I'll call you later, and I'll accompany you around." I looked at her carefully.

She hummed noncommittally, put on her coat and went out.Seeing that she was about to go out, my mother grabbed her and whispered, "Xiao Liu, don't go, help Fanfan's staff."

She looked at me and smiled without saying a word. I hurriedly pulled my mother back to the living room, "Okay, go and greet the guests."

After Liu Qingyan left, my mother called me over again to talk with Aunt Zhang.I sat there and basically didn't talk much, just humming and haha ​​coping a few words, but I was thinking of Liu Qingyan who was wandering alone.I have wronged my wife.

Maybe the mother and son saw my lack of enthusiasm and didn't stay at home for lunch.As soon as they were gone, my mom asked me how I was feeling.

I told her while getting dressed, "I don't feel like it." I don't want to say too much, I'm worried about Liu Qingyan.

After I met Liu Qingyan in the garden in the middle of the street, I briefly said a few words, I said I didn't feel it, no matter how good a man he was, I definitely wouldn't look for him. "Honey, I just want to be with you." Although there is no need to promise, there are still some things that must be said.

"You don't have to worry about me, I'm fine." Liu Qingyan read my worry from my eyes, and comforted me with a smile instead, "It's just a blind date, I won't be so narrow-minded and make random guesses. I willow Qingyan is not you, Mo Fan, so you have no confidence."

I heard her start to tease again, so I observed her expression, afraid that she was pretending not to care.Along the way, I couldn't see anything strange from her smiling face.

At the stage when she and Concubine Chen broke up, she never revealed her true thoughts.Seeing her seemingly calm expression, I asked in a low voice, "Did I make you feel wronged? I will tell my mother, don't introduce anyone to me in the future. I will never get married in this life."

She looked at me with strange eyes, "You want to come out? You can consider the consequences and your family's ability to bear it. I said I don't care if you go on a blind date."

She was right.It's not that I haven't thought about coming out. Instead of hiding it like this, I might as well just tell my family that I just like women, and I will live like this for the rest of my life, so don't bother introducing me to someone.

But every time I think of my mother, I become timid.I sighed and held her hand tightly, "Don't worry, I will take care of my own affairs and never let you be caught in the middle and be wronged."

Anyway, I stayed for a few days and left. Even if my mother forced me to go on a blind date, I would tell her that I didn't feel it.She can't force me to marry a man I don't like.

I underestimated my mother's eagerness to marry me off. What I didn't expect was that she chased me to Beijing not long after I went back.