my private life

Chapter 11 See You Again

Xia Jingyi's unexpected appearance made me feel at a loss for a moment.

In a panic, I forced an awkward smile at her, then lowered my head and pretended to concentrate on cleaning up the dishes on the other table, secretly guessing the purpose of her visit.

Instead, my mother immediately greeted warmly, "Doctor Xia, why do you come here for breakfast?" She said as she pulled a chair over to let Xia Jingyi sit at the table.

"I just got off the night shift and went out to do some errands. I stopped by to see your breakfast stall. I heard from Fanfan that the business is good." Xia Jingyi sat down, her voice sounded very peaceful.

I sneaked a glance at Xia Jingyi, and found that there seemed to be nothing unusual about her expression, so I let go of my hanging heart.Maybe she knows that I have been to her grandma's house and that I have called her.That's why she came to me.Thinking of this, I was a little secretly happy.

My mother smiled a little embarrassedly, and kept wiping her hands on her apron, "I heard from Fanfan that you like to eat steamed stuffed buns. There just happened to be hot steamed stuffed buns out of the pan."

Xia Jingyi also smiled and replied, "Okay, I'll have two hot buns and a bowl of porridge."

At this time, two more customers came, and my mother urged, "Fanfan, why are you still standing there, quickly bring buns to Dr. Xia." She went to greet the guests while talking.

I put the bun in front of Xia Jingyi, took a quick look at her and said in a low voice, "This is stuffed with pork and cabbage, and stuffed with celery." Because of excitement and nervousness, my voice sounded stiff, lacking the necessary enthusiasm .I stood at the table with my hands hanging by my side, waiting for her reply.

"That's fine. Fanfan, have you volunteered?" She raised her face and asked.

For a moment, I felt that she stared at me very meaningfully, as if she wanted to imply something.Maybe this is just my illusion, when I met her eyes, her expression had returned to normal, looking at me with a gentle smile, reminded me of her appearance when I was lying on the operating table, as if there was no relationship between us. None of the excitement of that night.

"The first choice is to apply to the University of International Business and Economics." After I finished speaking, she lowered her head and picked up the buns and started to eat.

I was still standing beside her, waiting for her next words.She ate very elegantly, taking a small bite of the bun, chewing slowly with her mouth closed, not as bold as when eating dumplings with me before.

I looked at her in a daze, and it wasn't until she finished eating a bun that I realized that the porridge hadn't been served to her yet.

Xia Jingyi finished her breakfast and took out the money to give to my mother, but my mother pushed her back. "Okay then, when Fanfan's admission letter comes out, I'll treat her to dinner." She turned and looked at me, "Don't forget to tell me when you get the letter."

My mother immediately accepted the quarrel and said with a smile, "Fanfan often troubles you, so I don't have the nerve to ask you to spend money."

After hearing what she said, my first reaction was that there will be contact between us in the future.I raised my head and showed a bright smile, "How could I forget you." After I finished speaking, I was worried that my mother would see through the words that seemed to be confessing to her, so I hurriedly muttered, "You are my teacher."

Xia Jingyi raised her eyebrows and walked away with a noncommittal smile.I looked at her fading back, and suddenly felt the urge to call her back, and I wanted to tell her loudly: I miss you, I like you, and I will never forget you.

I stood there just talking to myself in my heart.My mother was still introducing Xia Jingyi, who was no longer visible, to other guests, saying that Dr. Xia was my benefactor.

Xia Jingyi is who I am, only we two understand that our relationship will always be an unspeakable secret.

Her appearance disturbed my calm heart even more. I was in a trance all morning, and my mind was full of thinking about her words and demeanor in the morning. Every look, every smile made me go over and over again. Aftertaste and pondering.Eventually, I came to the conclusion that it was time for me to go to her.

After finally staying up until the afternoon, I went to take a shower while my mother was out shopping for groceries.With a devotion as if to dedicate myself, I rinsed my body carefully.Then I wrapped in a towel and went out of the bathroom, locked the door behind me, and drew the curtains.

I stood naked in front of the mirror and mustered up the courage to look at the person in the mirror.My breasts are still underdeveloped, and my hips are not upright enough. Maybe it will take a few years before my figure matures to be as graceful as Xia Jingyi.

I opened my closet to choose from the few items I didn't already have and realized that I needed a decent set of adult underwear, the kind that had a wire-to-foam pad for my boobs, not what my mom is buying for me now The kind of girl-specific breast wrap.

After trying on two outfits, I finally settled on a white t-shirt with blue denim shorts.I'm a little confused about what shoes to wear.My sandals and sneakers were bought the year before last, and they looked a bit shabby.Especially for cheap sneakers, the threads on the uppers are all open.

I remembered that more than a month ago, my mother bought me a pair of fake Nikes and put them in the shoe cabinet, saying that she would wait for me to go to college and wear new shoes on a new road.I ran over to find the pair of shoes, matched them with a pair of white socks, and put them on quickly.

Before going out, I looked in the mirror again, smoothed out my thick and fluffy hair with my fingers, removed the white shoes that looked a bit glaring, and I was still neat and tidy.

This is the first time I went to an appointment in my life. I was so excited that I made various guesses along the way, imagining what it would be like to meet Xia Jingyi.

I knew that she was on the night shift and had a rest during the day, so I went directly to her house.In the corridor, I tidied up my hair and clothes again, and then I raised my hand and knocked on her door.

The door opened quickly.Seeing me, Xia Jingyi, who was wearing pajamas and her hair was a little messy, was taken aback for a moment, and then said with a dull expression, "Come in." Before I could speak, she had already folded into the living room.

I thought she would be as excited as me when we met, and told me tenderly that she couldn't eat or sleep during the few days when I didn't see me, and then there was a passionate kiss.Of course, all of these are my own fantasies based on the romance TV series on the road.

Xia Jingyi's indifference extinguished my enthusiasm.I think it was because I came to her without saying hello in advance, which affected her rest, and made her unhappy.

I looked very boring standing in the living room, and I didn't want to walk or not.She sat back on the sofa with an open medical book beside her.Apparently she was reading just now.

She crossed her legs and folded her hands in front of her chest, looked at me without saying a word, and after a long time she pointed at the sofa beside her and motioned for me to sit over.

I sat down obediently, deliberately keeping a distance of more than ten centimeters from her.Still without saying a word, she squinted at me.I was even more disturbed by her look, and asked without words, "Aren't you going to work the night shift tonight?"

She curled the corner of her mouth and smiled shallowly, "Did you figure it out that I didn't come here because I didn't work the night shift?"

Seeing her slightly sarcastic smile, I immediately shook my head in denial, "No, I wanted to come a long time ago, and I was afraid of you..." I think she should understand what happened later.

But she seemed to be doing it on purpose, and asked nonchalantly, "Why are you afraid of me? Are you afraid that I, a bad woman, will seduce you and lead you into ruin?"

I didn't expect her to have such an attitude. I looked at her anxiously and explained, "No, I never thought about it that way." In order to convince her, I said, "I told you, I like you. Really Yes." I thought she would still touch me like last time, so I moved to her side, and my bare~naked legs were next to hers tightly.

She turned her face away and looked out the window.After a moment of silence, she said in a low voice, "Fanfan, don't come here again."

Her words blew me away like thunder.It turned out that she didn't like me, that night was just a game. "I thought you liked me too." After I finished laughing at myself, I lowered my head and stared at my toes. The white sneakers looked so dazzling.

"It has nothing to do with whether I like you or not. Fanfan, I..." Her face was covered by messy hair, I couldn't see her expression, but I could hear the nasal sound in her voice.

It reminds me of that old friend she said. "I'm like your friend, that's why you are like that. In fact, you don't like me at all, do you?" I asked a little angrily.

The emotion that has tormented me for days is a misunderstanding.People are really contradictory. When I was alone, I secretly hoped that this was a misunderstanding, and then I returned to a regular relationship with her, but now when I hear that she wants to sever the relationship, my sensitive and fragile self-esteem But I can't take it anymore.

"That's not exactly what I said, I like you too." She finally turned her face to look at me, "Fanfan, you are still too young, you don't understand many things, I shouldn't be like that." Tears filled her eyes , reached out and stroked my hair lovingly.

Our gender and age identities bring me infinite confusion, and it is also a gap that cannot be bridged.For me, I didn't think about the future at all, I just wanted to be with her.

"But I like you." Apart from this sentence, I don't know what other words I can use to make her understand my heart.I grabbed her other hand and put it to my mouth, letting the back of her hand gently rub against my lips.

She looked at me blankly, and asked for a long time, "Have you thought about it, do you really like it?"

I also looked straight at her and nodded solemnly.She took me into her arms, held my face in one hand, and stared at me with a complicated expression.

I thought she was going to say something, but I didn't hear anything.She lowered her head slightly and kissed my lips.We hugged and kissed like that.

This time in broad daylight, I didn't feel shy or uneasy.It was as if I had come here for such intimacy.

She let go of her hand until both of them were almost out of breath, hugged me and murmured, "Fanfan, Fanfan, you make me so conflicted." She reached into my clothes and rubbed my cheeks. back.

I rested my head on her shoulder, rubbing my face against her neck.I prefer the feeling of tenderness with her to the things that go on late at night.

We seldom speak anymore, and each other seems to be afraid that words will destroy this peaceful and warm atmosphere.Sitting hugging each other until the room was a little hazy, Xia Jingyi proposed to go out for dinner together.

I want to stay at night.She didn't agree or disagree, she just asked if my mother knew I was here with her?

I called home.It was my father who answered the phone, and I told him that I would not be going home at night, and that I would accompany Dr. Xia, because she was afraid of sleeping alone.

I put down the phone, Xia Jingyi patted my butt, and laughed and cursed, "Little villain, you have learned to lie."

How did I know that when I embarked on this bumpy road, what accompanied me most were all kinds of lies to cover people's eyes.