Black Powder Monologue Diary

Chapter 65 Chapter 64

======================

She chose an ordinary topic to ask Ji Shanye: Do you like watching football games?This is not very common, girls rarely like to watch football games.

She looked at Ji Shanye who was on the opposite side, and Ji Shanye nodded, and just said: Yes.

Then there was nothing to say.The host Wei Wei felt that Ji Shanye was a bit strange today, and a bold idea slowly popped up in his heart, could it be that Ji Shanye likes men at all?

impossible.

The host suppressed his messy thoughts, and asked him again: Do you have any idea of ​​getting married now?

Ji Shanye paused for a few seconds, and said: I thought about getting married before, but it seems that I have no chance now.

The host asked: When you were with Tan Ling?

Ji Shanye shook his head: No.

The host seemed a little surprised, and asked again: Who is that?

Ji Shanye was silent for a few seconds, and only said: There was such a person.

The host asked cautiously: Are you not together now?

Ji Shanye said: We are not together anymore.

The host said: Why did the two break up?Is it convenient to say?

Ji Shanye lowered his eyes and looked at the desktop: Maybe I haven't done well.

The host felt that Ji Shanye was joking, so he smiled lightly and said: Are there still things you can't do well?

Ji Shanye's mouth twitched, but he didn't speak.

Only then did the host realize that Ji Shanye might be serious about what she said, and she couldn't help but become serious, wondering when did Tan Ling's vision get so bad, or was it someone else?

The host said: Because of what kind of thing, there will be such an idea?

Ji Shanye said: I used to think that when I fell in love, I should be a good lover. Although I may not be 100% satisfied, I should be qualified.But in fact, I did not do as well as I imagined, and it can even be said to be very bad.

Ji Shanye said: There are many things that I can't meet the other party's requirements. Some simple things, such as dating and eating, can't be done because of work reasons.

The host said: So, did you separate because you got together less and separated more?

Ji Shanye said: I used to think it was, but later I realized that there are many reasons, and gathering less and leaving more is just one of the very simple problems.

Ji Shanye said: I hope the audience will not regard me as a perfect saint, I also have shortcomings.You may know me in private, and you will find that it is completely different from what you imagined.

The host said: It seems that this relationship has a great influence on you.

She asked: Do you still have contact with the other party?

Ji Shanye was silent, raised his head and smiled slightly, the smile looked a bit bitter, he said: It's gone.

She asked again: Is there anything you want to say to the other party?The host felt that Ji Shanye and his predecessor felt that there was something deep to dig.

Ji Shanye was silent for a long time after listening to her question.

After a long time, he said: Let's go to the next question, I don't want to answer this question.

The host was a little disappointed, there were a few worthless questions left, and the interview was over by then.

In the end, Ji Shanye and the host said goodbye to the camera together, and then at the end of the film, the show ended Ji Shanye's work, took off his earphones, and followed the staff to go outside to cut in the back of the nanny's car.

In the cluttered background, Ji Shanye walked forward in silence, his back looked a little lonely.

I can't explain how I feel, I feel very sad.After the breakup, in order to avoid thinking about the past, I rarely read news about Ji Shanye on the Internet.

He looked like nothing had changed, and everything had changed.He just doesn't belong to me anymore, and has become the high-ranking superstar he used to be.

I suddenly felt that I was far away from him.

In the interview, he talked about his favorite type, and I couldn't help but compare with myself.I like to watch football games. I'm good-looking, but I'm a bit sidelined, although I'm a bit ugly now that I've cut my hair.Doesn't say a lot, but takes a little.Eyes crooked when you smile?Do my eyes cringe when I smile?Usually I don't pay attention to this.

It sounds a lot like me.But I dare not think too much about the topic of ideal type. Most of what celebrities say in interviews is not very credible.

As for his ex, I actually thought at first he was talking about me, but then I thought it wasn't.He's not always going to be just me, an ex-boyfriend, maybe he's talking about someone else.When we were together before, I never asked him about his ex.But I don't know who he was talking about in the interview.

Moreover, I don't think I, an ordinary person, will have that much influence to make him think that he is an imperfect lover.

I read the comments on the Internet, and found that everyone's concerns about this interview are completely different from mine.They were more concerned about Ji Shanye's private life and his ambiguous words.

In fact, after the interview, it caused a heated discussion on the Internet.Netizens are ridiculing that if a man like Ji Shanye says he is not good, then there are no good men in the world.

I saw a Weibo with a high volume of comments and retweets.

%40 Chunmeng Wuhen: Ji Shanye said that he had talked with his family and they would not urge him to get married.He also said that the type he likes is the one who likes to watch football games.It's hard not to think that he likes men.

At first, she may have been teasing, but later a marketing account found out Ji Shanye's attitude towards homosexuality when he was still in college, and found that he did not object.That's why he might just like the same sex at all.

Moreover, in the interview, Ji Shanye's performance was similar to guessing, so netizens finally took this issue seriously, and the entry %23 Ji Shanye came out%23 immediately became popular.

Many people have said that Ji Shanye accepted this interview as a secret and public outing.But there were also some objections. After all, it was clear that Ji Shanye had a relationship with Tan Ling in the past, and Ji Shanye would not be gay.

There was endless debate outside, but Ji Shanye didn't respond.After the interview, he seemed to have disappeared, and no one could find him.

After reading a lot on the Internet, it was already dark and I hadn't eaten yet.I didn't have any appetite, my mind was full of messy guesses, I looked at my phone and found the dialog box with Ji Shanye, I really wanted to say something to him.

We haven't been in touch for a long time.

Sending him a message suddenly will disturb him, and he probably doesn't like to see my messages.

What kind of imperfect lover is he?Obviously I am.A mentally ill lunatic, sensitive and cowardly, how could he still deserve his love.

Forget it, let it be.

20

2021. 10, 13

It becomes cooler.

It rained on the mountain.I used to think of my mother every time it rained.However, during the recent period, I think of Ji Shanye more and more.

I remember that it rained the day after we broke up with him. The rain that day was very similar to this, the drizzle was hazy, like dense needles.

I really want to see him.I want to see him every day, but I am afraid.

I finally understand why the protagonists in the idol dramas I watched before can write so many hypocritical words in their daily life, because now I am the same.

Only in the diary can I dare to reveal my true emotions.